Heart to heart chats

Overcoming your Three Greatest Challenges in the New Year

0 · Jan 3, 2014 ·

Well friends, 2014 is officially here. And after traveling to Lake Leelanau, Detroit and East Lansing and hosting 2 dinner parties all in the past 2 weeks, I’m ready for life to start getting back to a normal pace. I am also ready for focus on things ahead.

I have never been one for New Year’s resolutions though. I suppose it’s really more of a fear of failing at them, which most people do. So rather than concurring my fears, I tend to just avoid them. Which right now, I fully intend to continue doing. You see, a couple months ago I thought that if I blogged about my goals for the month, it would help me stay accountable. That didn’t work either. I was purposely vague about them (rather than making them specific and attainable as I have been taught in all my business classes) and I just disappointed myself, in the end feeling more like a failure.

So on that note, I’ve been trying to figure out how to approach 2014, both personally and professionally. I still haven’t figured it out. However, on Sunday we had a guest speaker at our church and I think he had some great insights on the New Year. Here’s what he had to say:

Overcoming your Three Greatest Challenges in the New Year

1. There will be storms to survive.

The New Year will provide new challenges. Some of those might be left over from last year and some may be completely out of the blue and brand spanking new. But either way, God is with you. With Him, you can weather the storm. The key is to keep your eye on the provider, the one who can calm the wind and the waves, rather than focusing on the problem, or the storm itself.

2. There will be mountains to climb.

Instantly when he said this the first thought that came to mind was “no hill for a stepper” – which is a ridiculous saying that I have heard come out of my mother’s mouth time and time again. But there’s some truth there. Take one step at a time making your way to the top. It might be a slow journey, but you can make it. God is for you! When God looks at you, he can see your full potential. Have faith that through Him you can do all things.

3. There will be battles to fight.

God is fighting for you.

“Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all the generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21.

Our minds are so little and cannot even comprehend all the God is able to do. Do you ever wonder if God finds our simple requests silly and is up there having a good chuckle? Nevertheless, He will fight for you. The outcome might not be exactly what you had planned, but that’s okay. I think He has His eye on a bigger picture.

I know there will be surprises along the way and challenges on the road ahead. However, I’m having faith that there is a greater plan and better things yet to come in 2014.

Happy New Year!

The beautiful bouquet above was created by yours truly this fall and photographed so beautifully by Bradley James Photography.

The Birthday Challenge

0 · Nov 26, 2013 ·

Guess what?! Miss Gretta is officially 1 year old today! I can’t even believe it!! Margaretta James Ferguson, 6 lbs 13 oz, she was born at 11:32 pm on this chilly November day!

Which leads me into my next question, have you read about the contentment challenge? It is really inspiring me and has helped to focus on needs and necessities verse wants. Let’s face it, as Americans we are blessed with so much. Due to current circumstances Josh and I pretty much practice a bare bones living. Now that does not mean we don’t splurge or do something special now and again. But as of late, our spending habits are not very frivolous.

In addition, I have really been focusing on “Do what you can with what you have” – another piece of advice passed along to me that keeps ringing through my head. I know it’s the time of year where we are all supposed to be thankful, which I am, but this goes beyond that. It’s an ache in my heart. And at one time it was focus of my business. When I began, my hope was to prove that you don’t need an unlimited wedding budget to have a beautiful day. And you definitely don’t need to drive yourself into debt doing so. There’s something to be said about creating a simply pretty event. There’s an art to it.

With all this in mind, I am busy busy with my next project. It’s a very special party for my little birthday girl. My challenge has been creating an amazing party (which I am well aware that she will not remember – but I have to do it anyway!) without spending any money. Alright, I will admit, I’m going to spend a little, people need plates and napkins and I can’t resist putting together some beautiful blooms, but beyond that, everything has been created from things laying around the house. Recycle, reuse and spray-paint!! It is sort of my own version of the contentment challenge, The Birthday Challenge. This is a very peaceful mindset and I cannot wait to share the results of the party, as well as this challenge as suddenly I feel like I am able to look at my humble house with new eyes.

In case I don’t have another chance to blog again this week, have a fabulous Thanksgiving!!!

The above photo was Gretta at 5 months, from Hetler Photography. I think it’s time for some new ones, don’t you???

Be Still

0 · Sep 18, 2013 ·

Lately I’ve been in this strange place. I want more from my business, more from life and yet not wanting so much that I can’t actually LIVE my life. So I’ve talked about balance before, trying to figure out this perfect formula for living. But maybe it’s not just balance I need to focus on, maybe it’s also contentment.

“You will not find My Peace by engaging in excessive planning, attempting to control what will happen to you in the future.”

-Sara Young, Jesus Calling

This showed up in my Instagram feed this morning. Umm… I plan things for a living, so what am I supposed to make of this?

A couple weeks ago I shared my perfect plan about what this summer was supposed to look like for me. I’d be wrapping up wedding season, be able to sit down and relax in my super awesome studio space and so on (read more here – just in case you missed it).

And again we’ll fast forward to today… I want more, more, MORE! I have not wrapped up wedding season and am still getting inquiries for 2013, which is absolutely amazing and I am so thankful for. However, I am still greed stricken as I want my 2014 to start filling up and I want to book more weddings and have a better peace of mind.

“Be still and know that I am God”

-Psalms 46:10

I just need to step back and stop trying to figure out how to get more, and rather start focusing on what I have TODAY. Today might actually be a pretty amazing day, if I can just stop thinking about tomorrow.

I was looking through my notebook and I have the words “Gratitude changes everything” scribbled across my notes. So that’s the thought I’m going to leave with today. Be thankful.

September Goals

0 · Sep 3, 2013 ·

September. The hum of lawn mowers and bees will soon be replaced by the crunching of leaves. The scent of honeysuckle swapped for pumpkin spice and the holidays are right around the corner. I usually await the start of fall with open arms.

I’m just not sure if I’m ready yet this year. Sure I can still hit the beach on a nice day, but somehow the mindset and mood is just a little different. You have to savor these last scarce nice days knowing that there are so few left. (And I love Lara Casey’s post about savoring September which you can read here.)

So how do you do that? To begin, I have a list of things that I WILL accomplish THIS MONTH. I’m really horrible at tackling my to-do lists, but I’ve made my goals very achievable and I’m going to stick to it!

September’s Goals:

1. Focus on what matters most

I have weekend plans with family, lots of space in my schedule to play with Gretta and some time to share with friends

2. Get Organized

My desk is a little chaotic with several projects in the works and finished projects needing to be filed.
My work space and house is also evolving as Gretta has suddenly become a bit more mobile… everything needs to move up, up, UP.

3. Wrap up loose ends

I have so many “someday” projects. You know, those things that you’ll get to someday – those pictures that need to be hung, that drawer that needs to be organized, the chair that needs to be refinished. So, I’m going to start room by room and complete those things, starting NOW.

I sat down last night and looked at my September planner and thought I was going to have a pretty quiet month, and then I realized I just hadn’t written anything down yet! Oops…!!!

Photo by Bradley James Photography

So cheers to lots of projects, lots of pretty and lots of accomplished goals!! Happy September!

Our Social Connection

0 · Jul 31, 2013 ·

Social media is this worldwide phenomenon that keeps us oh so connected with people that we might otherwise never see or speak to, or at least have a very limited contact to. Thanks to Twitter, Facebook and Instagram I can now know what my high school crush’s first baby not only looks like, but also know the exact moment that they took their first steps and said “mama”. I am able to connect with other wedding professionals across the country and see the mock ups they created for their clients today or know that they’re having a slow week. Through the magic of selfies I now know exactly how much eye make-up my friends are wearing, if they are having a bad hair day and what shade of pink their blouse is. I see when someone splurged on a new Coach bag, is drinking coffee at their desk, in the middle of a brand re-launch or if their hubby bought them flowers “just because”. I feel so connected.

But am I really???

While we might post the random comment expressing a strong distaste for some political movement or a fit of road rage, we really don’t let our true selves shine through. In reality, we create this online “virtual version” of ourselves, sharing only the side of us that we really want people to see, usually the more positive one. We showcase our fabulous lives, the glitz and the glam, nights out on the town and the high end purchases we just made on our huge shopping spree. What we don’t share is the credit card debt or the blisters on our toes from the amazing 4 inches heels that you just had to party like a rock star in. In a sense we’re branding ourselves. We’re all our own paparazzi and PR professionals. We broadcast our lives in the light that we want others to see it in.

I don’t really know what it’s like to be you. I don’t know what makes your worry or how insecure you are about your next move in life. I may read your blog and see your triple post across Twitter, Facebook and Instagram (is it really that important that I see it all three times???), but what I don’t know what really makes you tick, what’s keeping you up at night or gets under your skin. Since I have a this false sense of knowledge about how peachy your life is, I use it as an excuse not to pick up the phone and call or meet for coffee and stay really connected. The sound of people’s voices is becoming a piece of the past as text replaces talk.

We laugh that future generations won’t know how to write, other than the short hand versions we use in texting and proper grammar might be lost forever. But could we also loose the feeling of actual human contact as well?

Just some thoughts on my mind lately, as I have found that I compare myself to other professionals, thinking the grass is much greener on their side of the fence (or town or country). I am discouraged by their success not taking into account their failures. I by no means am saying that I’m getting rid of social media or dislike checking my Facebook page and Instagram feed, I just want to keep things in perspective. I love to see what others are up to. I want to see your vacations photos and be jealous of your time at the beach. I enjoy seeing your children grow and your thoughts on life. Sometimes you even inspire me. But I also want to see the real live version of your face and connect on a more personal level. I want you to know that I really do care and I want to be you friend, to share your sorrows, joys and all life’s happy moments.

Photo by Shannon Scott {Smug Shots}

Let’s create friendships that last!!

After “I Do”

0 · Jul 28, 2013 ·

I generally try not to blog or do any work on a Sunday. Sunday’s are that amazing day every week where we can sit back and relax, take a nap after church and possibly not plan anything at all and just let the day happen.

However, sometimes my brain doesn’t really get that memo. I find myself daydreaming about wedding plans, designs and colors. I’m guilty of looking at other’s sneak peeks from the weekend’s wedding and events. I’m thinking about my upcoming brides, with upcoming plans, both in the distant future and in the upcoming week. And even if I can manage to steer my mind away, I my mind just wonders to thoughts about home décor and I find myself staring at the hideously awful green color of my living room/office.

So in all the wedding magazines, websites and planning tools I stumbled across, in combination of advice and words of wisdom from family and friends, I don’t feel that anyone really prepared me for this. This being the I’ve-been-married-3-years-live-in-a-“starter”-home-have-a-baby-a-career-and-want-life-to-be-perfect stage of life. Sure people gave me useless pieces of advice like “You must fall in love over and over again, with the same person” or warnings that the first year of marriage would be the toughest (which I do not agree with!) But how could you really prepare for this? How can you warn people what being married is like?

I just read that… warn people. Is that really what I meant? Certainly not! But sometimes, yes. Each year, month, week, day and hour brings a new challenge of married life. So I debate… should I share these challenges with you? Should someone give you a little glimpse of the life that comes after “I do”? It’s a battle and balance between personal and professional, a line that I’m constantly trying to keep in check. But I can’t help but wonder, what exactly are the marriages I’m helping to create going to be like?

I promised myself I would never help my couples do all the planning for their wedding, walk down the aisle and then just leave, never to be seen or heard from again. So in starting to share a little bit more of my day to day life, I hope to help inspire and encourage those of you who might find yourself in a “rough patch” of marriage or just feeling blah and depressed for the day. We all feel that way, even those of us who seemingly have a perfect life, from the outside looking in anyway. Let’s move into Married Land together and learn from each other as we start this life “After I Do.”

Oh, and you know that rhyme, “First comes love, then comes marriage…” well this is Gretta a couple months ago, she arrived in the “baby carriage” last November. Kellie of Hetler Photography worked her magic and took some amazing pictures of the two of us back in May (Gretta was about 5 months).

Life’s Little Moments

0 · May 11, 2013 ·

Do the little things in life make you excited? I mean, there are these great moments in life that are huge, life changing make you want to scream from the rooftop and give you tingles all over… your first kiss, the day he proposed, walking down the aisle and saying “I do” and life after that, your first baby being born or even the moment that you find out your pregnant. But what about all those insignificant details in between?

Take a couple moments to appreciate the “little things” today. Stop and look at the pretty green leaves that have finally returned to us. Find pleasure in a stranger’s smile. Enjoy your late morning cup of coffee. Call your mom, it’s a day early, but I’ll be she’ll be surprised!

Remember to live a little between the “big moments”. Sometimes it is the journey that’s far more important than the destination. Some days I simple take a break from work and play with my baby girl, yes I could be doing the dishes that are piled in my sink or making my bed… but her smile is more important. Sometimes having a cup of coffee with my husband it more momentous that an elaborate date night. Find something beautiful in the everyday.

How do you feel when the sun comes out after a day of rain? It just brings a smile to my face. It’s a reminder of balance; we would not appreciate it so much without the gloomy times.

Image via Pinterest

I had a happy moment today… I hope you find one too!

Heart to heart chats

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