anniversary

Flower of the Week :: Daisies

0 · Jun 18, 2018 ·

This week we’re celebrating 8 years of marriage. Working in the wedding industry means that I’m always thinking back to my own wedding for one reason or another. But the trigger for this trip down memory lane is a field full of daisies.

We got married in my grandparents’ back yard, an outdoor ceremony overlooking the lake. It’s always been one of my favorite places on earth. There is, however, one spot in particular on their property that is even more magical. A small point of land that juts out into the water. This little pennisula is only a few feet wide and not very long at all, but the size never mattered. I used to spend hours in this spot. And it gets even better, because each June, it became overgrown with wild daisies sunbathing near the water.

Naturally I made sure that this sweet little flower would fit in with my wedding decor. It was one of the perks of getting married in June, these blooms would be a part of my wedding day.

I put this bouquet together to somewhat recreate my orginal bouquet made 8 years ago, complete with local peonies and sweet daisies. Photographed by Samantha James Photography.

Right now they’re dancing in the fields around our house and they take me right back to that place and time. This week, they’re the TownLine Journal Flower of the Week. Share your own daisies or follow along with mine #TLJfloweroftheweek here in my journal and on Instagram.

3 Tips for a Successful Marriage

0 · Jul 25, 2017 ·

Last month Josh and I celebrated 7 years of marriage. I was asked what the secret is. I don’t really think there’s a secret to making a marriage last but if I had to sum it up, I might use words like stubbornness or persistence. You have to refuse to give up, even when the going gets tough.

Before we were married, we did premarital counseling. In all the wedding planning blogs and timelines and lists of things to do after you become engaged, this little step rarely makes the list. Someday I’d really like to expand upon this subject, because it’s not nearly as scary as it sounds. In the meantime, there are three things that I remember our counselor telling us to do regularly to increase our chances of a successful marriage.

Tips for a Successful Marriagen | The Day's Design | Samantha James Photography

Photography: Samantha James Photography

Listen for 20 Minutes a Day

20 minutes of uninterrupted conversation per day is essential. It’s also nearly impossible and anyone with kids will agree. We don’t sit there with a stopwatch or anything, but we both make a point to listen to one another and share what’s on our minds each day. Communication is key to success.

Date Once a Week

7 years ago I remember thinking what an easy concept this sounded like. Once a week, we go out or stay in or do something together. Put the phones away and just spend some quality time. But through the years, it’s gotten much harder. We have busy schedules, he works full time and has passions on the side, I own a business, we have two kids under the age of 5, babysitters are expensive and often hard to come by, there are home improvement projects in the works and the list goes on.

For us, date night often is the equivalent of putting the girls to bed a half hour early and then eating dinner together, just the two of us. We might watch a movie or play games, we rarely even leave the house for our dates anymore. But that’s what works for us. And we might not actually do this once a week, but we do try to make some sort of an effort on this front. Scheduling it ahead of time so we have something to look forward to is also really helpful.

Get Away Once a Month

The last piece of this quality time equation requires you as a couple to disconnect from the outside world for 24 hours. Whether it’s an overnight stay out of town or you send the kids to grandma’s for the day, our counselor recommended planning a getaway once a month. This one is by far the hardest and we rarely follow this suggestion. We have our nights away from the girls here and there and definitely take advantage as much as possible, but we don’t’ stick to this rule. However, it think it’s still worth mentioning and maybe someday we’ll be able to get back on track with this tidbit of advice.

If you didn’t notice the pattern, spending quality time and communication is key. A marriage can’t thrive without meaningful interaction and understanding, along with the persistence to stick to these guidelines and never give up on one another. While I’m certainly not an expert on the subject, I think if your partner always remains a top priority, your chances of success are greatly increased.

7 Years

3 · Jun 20, 2017 ·

When I was first married, my mother told me that the first 7 years would be the hardest. Yesterday, we officially hit that seven year mark. While I certainly don’t know what the next 7 years hold, I can say the past 7 haven’t been without their challenges. But with challenge comes triumph and these years have shaped so much of who we are today.

The past years have been full of newness; we bought a house, remodeled the house, sold the house and moved to a new city. They’ve been full of excitement; we’ve had two little girls and watched them grow. There’s been moments of anger, hurt and loss. New jobs, saying goodbye to old friends and making new ones. Leaps of faith, starting a business and sometimes living on a prayer. There have been times when one of us, if not both, have been tempted to throw in the towel and just give up. There’s been grief, as some of those people who starting this journey with us are no longer by our sides today. While there’s been much joy and celebration in these years, there’s also been trial and heartache. And anyone who thinks that they’ll wake up every single morning madly in love with the person in bed beside them, has a whole slew of lessons headed their way.

I firmly believe that it’s our reaction to these moments – the good ones and the bad – that build character. These are the times that define ourselves and our relationships. They can make us strong or sink us. It really is your choice each and every morning to choose love and move onward, together.

It certainly isn’t my business to be handing out marriage advice. Mine is so far from perfect. But I can say that year 7 is full of promise and today is filled more love than many days of the past.

Working in an industry that thrives on love is really interesting when examining your own lives and relationships. We can say that we shouldn’t compare ourselves, but let’s face it, it happens. Sometimes I look at the bride sitting in front of me with a newly engaged glow and I can’t help but be envious. I completely disagree with anyone that says that business isn’t personal. My business touches my personal life and tugs on my heartstrings every single day. Whether it’s the emotions that I share with a new client as she giddily tells me how he proposed or the thrill of excitement that rushes through me as I discover a new blossoming bush in our back yard or perhaps even the moment of frustration that sneaks in when a last minute email or project takes me away from being able to plan a walk in the park with my girls. It’s all personal.

Because my business is so personal, it felt really appropriate to share a little project that I’ve been working on during our anniversary week. This is the anniversary of when I really truly understood for the first time what weddings are all about. It’s not the centerpieces, the flowers or the venue. It’s what those things represent and the celebration and commitment behind it all. I’ve been working on rebranding, really defining my style and my ethics and honing in on what love really means to me. Throughout this week here on the journal and on Instagram, I’ll be sharing more of the mission and person behind the blooms, because to me it’s so much more than just a pretty bouquet of flowers. It’s all leading up to my brand new website launch on Friday (if life doesn’t hand me lemons before then!) So stay tuned and we’ll celebrate together.

Photography: Shannon Scott Photography

And happy anniversary to those two young babes up there – you have no idea what’s about to come your way!!

3 Years Ago

0 · Jun 19, 2013 ·

I was married 3 years ago today. 3 years ago Pinterest did not exist and wedding blogs were yet to dominate the internet planning world. I purchased bridal magazines and used creations from my very own imagination. 3 years ago I had a wedding filled with rustic and earthy details that have long since been forgotten about by my guests. Timelines and seating charts are a thing of the past and my ivory taffeta gown is shoved in the back of my closet. Linens and charger plates have been returned and my gorgeous peony and wildflower bouquet has long since wilted.

So what remains from my wedding 3 years ago? A marriage.

For 3 years now I have had a man by my side. Together we have built a life full of stress, chaos and laughter. Since we said “I do” we have celebrated a life together full of family, sorrow, adventure and new life. I cannot think of a person I’d rather have by my side.

We are long since past the point of living in wedded bliss. The “honeymoon phase” dissolved quickly as argued about paint colors, kitchen remodeling plans and whether or not shoes should be worn in the house. Sometimes we go to bed angry. Sometimes I have to vent to friends and gripe about how his way of thinking is completely backwards and opposite (and clearly wrong!) from mine.

Recently I was asked how I knew that I was marrying the right man. What a loaded question! I never had that a-ha moment where I just knew that Josh was “the one”. I really didn’t even know where to begin in answering that, but after much debate here’s my conclusion. You much choose to love someone for the rest of your life. Butterflies and bliss will not last forever, so if that’s what your marriage is based on, be prepared for failure. Spend some time on your knees, I asked God every night to show me if there was a reason I should not marry Josh. He will show you. Do not take this commitment lightly, being caught up in the romance of a wedding. Make sure you can handle their cute little quirks, which will drive you crazy later. Think about what your life would be life without him, does that scenario even exist? And be prepared to never give up.

Photo by Shannon Scott {Smug Shots}

Happy Anniversary baby… I love you!!

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